yesterday was sunny windy sunny windy....
today...it's sunny hazy hazy sunny....

felt pretty tired today...maybe becoz i wasn't napping for the past 2 dayz...
saturday night was super high...@ S.H.E concert...reached home kinda late...sunday...the whole morning and afternoon did nothing coz went my grandma's house..it's been a really really long time since i last visited her...last visit was probably dated months ago...then after...didn't go for her bday buffet coz that time was the exam period...so i felt that i seriously need to visit her...at least do my tiny part as a filial grandson...

actualli...it's quite sad that i ain't really close to any of my relatives...both the 'father-side' and the 'mother-side'...in fact...we met up at most 2-3 times in a year...sigh...how i wish the family bonds could have been stronger.....

okayz....lets continue...so on sunday...when i came back home...it's alr abt 3pm and i felt i ought to start on the tuts for this week...didn't take a nap...zoomed into 3124 which was quite irritating...coz of the graph plottings and stuff...got quite irritated that i simply only attempted 2116...

and mondays are supposedly my 'monday-bleus' dayz....my mood-swing-and-don't-wan-to-attend-lessons dayz...the supposed 1hr-and-f-off dayz...haha...afterall giving it so many names...i decided that for once...i should attend at least another tut on monday...2116 that will be! the lecturer's tut lesson is super good...at least i learnt quite something from it...unlike the g060001 TA...haha..but it's super packed...and after the tutz...i decided to stay for awhile to do my 2125 assignment thatz due on friday...was doing in am empty tutorial rm until i got chased out... and not knowing where to go..i ended up at a bench at the windy aisle near LT6...super windy...it has got to be the 'windiest' place in NUS!!! so i was there with shiyao's shoe bag (coz he forgotten to take)...and attempting to carry on with my work despite the wind...shiyao came...then an entire crowd of yr 1s walked past...apparently finishing some lect in lt7 and heading to the next lt...saw her...but she's gone as fast as the wind...i wasn't being noticed! haha...sat there to waste time for a while more before heading home...reached home...looked at clock and decided it's too late to nap...so i work thru and finish the rest of the qns and off to give tuition...

1am-routine turns 12am-routine...cinderella decides the 1 extra hr is needed...


summary: 2 dayz without nap --> super lethargic...but will try to get used to it...


not tat i'm against napping...in fact...i think a short one is good...but one has got to be very disciplined in it...napped today....and somehow...it got extended to more than 1hr...over the threshold....feel super lazy even till now...argh!!!




微笑...thankz for the smile...it's enough to make my day...it's so nice! really....




some pple are just not worth helping...always asking for help...but never in any circumstances...do you see they offering their hands...always on the receiving ends...wat the heck! okay....i mean helping pple does not mean you must get any favors back in return...but isn't being able to give and help better than anything else? so...stop being pathetic and make yourself look vulnerable...


oppz...i just spotted a beetle in my room....bug-hunting time again!


my bad....wat a random post this is....but thatz just me larz...very rojak!

slowly early-ing the 1am routine...

the time now is 12:16am...



i shall sleep at 10pm some day....soon...

would you please stop the 1am routine!!!

you are tired...you need to sleep...

stop staying up and looking at the msn window!

::: S.H.E 移动城堡2007 concert :::

i shan't blog so much abt this...it's simply SUPER high!!!!

the front crowd was already standing at the very start....and you could clearly hear the entire indoor stadium singing along!!!

sun yanzi was power also!!! with 3 fast songs to bring up the crowd....

simply wild!!!!

encOrE...EnCoRe...eNcorE!!!!!


hebe looked so cool on the drum....



oh yahz....i went with ah yu larz...coz no one else wanna go...=P and i dun feel correct to treat her go...

and i saw tommy shu shu....





okiez....now that the funz is over...week 4 onwards...no more chocz left...no more hslx(i hope)...study!!!

i'm moving on....

but i realize i am still following behind you...

Kiss Goodbye will be gone for awhile...it'll be back...intend to make it a must-have song in my blog...oh well...as i have said before...因为一个人...i feel stupid again...

but for now...it's zs-recommend-nice-nice-song session again...the one playing in the background is "离不开他" by 温岚... carrie sang this song on the PSSII prelude on tv...i love her version...i love her voice....and of cuz...the original singer aint bad either...landy always has this " (erm...) fill your own words" in sad songz...like 祝我生日快乐 and 爱回温...地狱天使...etc...can't find a suitable word describe the sadness you can feel when listening to her songs...

离不开他 - 温岚

"音乐嘀嗒嘀嗒嘀嗒
舞步踢踏踢踏踢踏
每一步都是悲伤的挣扎
带着牵挂
谁都不想先停下
我穿着纯白的薄纱
跟着他旋转在灯下
知道是最后一次拥着他
日出后就应该
试着忘了要试着忘了他
我离不开他
也留不住他
心像空荡大厅
一切就要蒸发
我离不开他
风留不住沙
远去里的牵挂
是思念的时差
跟寂寞对话
我留不住他
耶噢耶
我还在想他
现在好想他好想他"

i forgot to mention that i saw her in sch yesterday....3 times...

1st...when i was having lunch in eng canteen...she was wth her friends...just came and were abt to buy food...in the very crowded canteen
2nd...when i finished lunch and went to fill my bottle before leaving the canteen...she and her friends got their food...and were heading back to their seats...
3rd...when i was leaving e2 to go for tutz...was walking down the stairs...and at a certain floor...the lift door opened and saw her in it...

haha...so qiao...

but then again...maybe not...i'm just thinking too much...nus eng aint very big afterall...

had a run tonight....finally...after procrastinating for so so long....

the usual route to teck whye...

the stitches were so pain...the legs aching...the breathless feeling...man...it made me feel...for once...i'm really living...tat i still have a journey to run...a breath to take...

i should say that the pain was excruciating...(is that how you spell it?) ...exaggerated..but yah...痛!!! but i just told myself to carry on...i just didn't wan to stop on my way back...i just didn't wan to submit to the pain...i knew i could overcome myself...

yah...it's so easy to overcome myself...but why does it seem impossible to overcome you?

i guess i would need such runs on a more often basis....

alrite...academic efforts shall start soon...last weekend to play and slack...

ktv tmr! and haha...the long awaited S.H.E concert!!!!

week4...2108 lab starting...sianz...assignments dueing...also sianz....tutz piling up....super sianz....quizes lingering....ultra sianz....

man...how to get this sian-ness away....

因为一个人 而从新喜欢一首歌

Kiss Goodbye....

i suddenly miss the taiwan trip last year...

the cold cold 台北...
the hazy 九份 (9 share)...
the raining 北投...
the late late 士林
the tall tall 101...
the nice nice taiwanese babes...(haha)

the many many good food...


argh...as can be seen from above...actually wanted to post something abt taiwan last yr...was looking thru the photos and stuff....BUT!!! sudden change of mood....

so, for now....
















i think i look quite 'shuai' when i am cue-ing...haha....getting narcissistic!!!

Elva - 表白
我一直很有自信
平常不怕说出口
但在你身边时候
突然感觉好害羞
boy u make me so shy
everytime u walk by
怎么我会变这样
身体不听我的
从没有过这感觉
情绪失去控制
dont know what u do to me
i just know it feels right
never felt this may like i'm outte control
不知道 不知道
为什么 对你说
喜欢你 说不出口
好想跟你表白
好想跟你表白
为什么 为什么
不知道 怎么说
喜欢你 说不出口
好想跟你表白
好想跟你表白

wat a bimbotic song!! haha...but the tune is very catchy...somehow...you will just sing along...and even rap along...lolz!!!

::: the greatest day of january :::

well...i want to have my fair share of a greatest day too...dun have to be frequent...once a month is good enough...

and so...it started off at 12plus am when my brother told me that TVUplayer could stream Ars vs Man Utd live at emirate stadium...(okayz...not perfect live...there was some lag time...but it's good enough for a guy without starhub cable tv...)

1st half - pretty exciting...equal share of possesion then goal-threatening plays...but i thought ars was losing in the midfield battle somehow...their passing was okay...but not potent enough to cause any trouble...rosicky was firing blanks everywhere...

2nd half - rooney scored with a header that came so sudden...evra sped down the left flank to receive a pass from ronaldo...then crossed it over 3 ars defenders to an unmarked rooney with an open goal...

Argh!!! the goal came so fast...then on...man utd kept possession and ars lost their grounds...smelling a possible first defeat at home...by arch rivals somemore....the gunners lads began to buck up and looked determined to fight back...

substitution: van persie in for the lacklustre hleb...

ars began to exert some home ground superiority...trying all sorts of attacking wayz...long balls from deep which were so unlike them...but good thing that they have adebayor who is so tall...trying hard to find the penetrating pass...

and of coz! the equalizer came...from a hard fought ball won by fabregas..passed to rosicky..low crossed in to centre...back flicked by henry...and!!! a wonderful goal by van persie from a sharp angle...83rd min!!!

the winning goal was equally fantastic...90+3 min...stoppage time...henry stood unmarked in the middle and headed...yes...he used his head to score against the mighty van der sar!!!..
hail the skipper!!!!

haa...being an avid fan of gunnerz...tatz is definitely the best cause for celebration!!! i even shouted when both goals were scored...

okay...tatz the end of my soccer commentatory...


had a lect CN2116 from 9-10am...and handed in the 1st graded assignment for the sem....AND!!!! end of my day in school!!!

and so...i went over to bpp to meet carine for lunch as agreed on sunday...her monday starts at 1pm...so late! but stretched to late in the evening...plus some cca training...haha...poor thing...bpp at 11am is...as usual...empty and cold...

not really knowing wat to eat...we settled for MOS burger...haha...fast food again! tat time was LJS...(but thatz like many many months ago!!) yah...and so it's lunch...after i end my day...and before she starts hers... i want my ichiban boshi soba!!!!

and so...we ate and chatted for awhile....















this is me...that phone isn't...SE w850!!! she got that phone tat i wanted to buy...but i still prefer the black one....anyway...the phone cover looks....erm....cute...















thatz her...refusing to let her face captured by my powerful 3.2 megapixel camera phone...


after lunch...went home to catch up on some sleep...and now, here i am blogging....gonna get my ass down to do abit of tut for this week and off to give tuition at night...


argh! tutorialz...they do still feature in my great day okay!!

looking forward to tmr's lunch...

but i will just go with a 平常心...

::: V-bash'07 :::

just came back from a night out at st james power station and supper...haa...quite fun to be hopping around the clubs and pubs there...though as the night gets late..the crowd gets overwhelmingly large!!!

seldom club....in fact...i should say i dun club at all...but this time is to give my dear nussu pru president , Mr Goh Ghim Song some face...and also those chem eng friends in pru....well...it's fun to go with craig and the gals larz...

danced like squeezed sardines in the dance floor...when occasionally...got one ang moh will come and try to get close to ah yu....hoohoo...haha...then i had to try to get b/w them....and i ended up being bua by him....eekz....lolz....the ang moh i think blind one /(haha...no offence to anyone in particular...)

strangely...didn't see alot of pple whom i expect to see...

and even more strangely...i was very sober...after 02 x tequila pop ...01 x shot...and some 'straw sucking' drinks....

i thought the crowd was good tonight...at power station...tiger live's wasn't moving...didn't really explored the other places...

thankz for the treat to the drinks! ah yu and ah cai!!! it's so good to have friends who are already out working....once in a while they happy then got treat...haha....galz, stay happy horz!!!! ask me out when you all feel happy then! haha....

okay...the fan blowing at speed 2 doesn't have some similar effect as a hair dryer....shall go to lalaland le....

tmr's gonna be a tut-sunday....unless got lunch or dinner date...if not...i will just be at home...attempting to do some quality work....can't let the horrendous slack-bug stay for long....this sem aint gonna be easy....

if there is one thing that is unchanged in this world...that would be me...

changes are only possible if i let time tend to infinity....

i'm not a good magician...

saw her in sch today...from a distance...while i was in the library...the red red noisy room...didn't think she saw me....well...it's enough to make me smile...for a split second...

have you ever feel like walking around...in places where she may appear...hoping for a chance to bump into someone?...or even just to catch a glimpse of tat person? and yet...you know that you would not know how to react if that really happen?


犯贱!!! (i'm scolding myself...)

the late bday present from NESWG...thankz guys!!! i love it!!! and thankz guang for delivering it to me in school...

so sorry that i didn't go last sat...was terribly sick...haha...not that i didn't wanna go....in fact...got tuition and a friend's bday tat day....all didn't go...so...i'm fair to everybody...heez...

thankz again....i owe who present money??? let me know okay?

PS: dun mind the textbook in the pic...haha...it's the fave WWWR txt which i have used for last sem(not much use)...and gonna use again for this sem... :P
positioned there to add colorz and show the scale...haha..oh yah...that blue thingy in the background is my bed larz...very cute bedsheet horz? haha...hello kitty...i also dunno how come my bedsheet so kawaii....

man...i'm gonna declare bankrupt soon...so broke from textbook buying....bought just 3 textbooks and i have already spent 120 buck!!! still got s.h.e concert to go...and cny clothes to buy...i'm BROKE!!!!

why do i feel like i'm collecting memories of you??

if i were a magician....i would make you disappear from my world....


cut my hair today...shorter(of cuz!)...messier(lolz)...i think i will just wear a cap tmr...lazy to style...shall see larz....


pooFfffffzzz....人间蒸发....

cinderella has been sleeping late this sem...1am!


dun mind me...i'm crazy

oh yah...of coz...not to forget...

HaPpY BdaY!!!! to my best buddy, Mr Ang Pueh Kiat...

take care...

feel so emotionally unstable these dayz...so you guys out there...better know when to leave me alone!!! dun irritate me too much!!!

went to walk walk alone today...though i didn't feel very well and wanted to rest...but i tot i could still afford sometime out to get some textbooks and ...erm...just walk around...alone...

went bpp...it's really a super long time since i last went there...(dun ask me why i go there...it's just some stupid reason...) okay...so the last time i went there was almost a yr ago...to celebrate yee'z and kok'z bday in feb 2006...still dunno 'her' at that point in time...so bpp, at that time, was nothing but just a place...

anyway...the place really has nothing left...even the bowling alley is closed...dunno if it will remain...

ended sch at 10 today...so went there at about 11am...very earli...not many pple...and super cold...roamed for awhile in POPULAR...and i have to say that the popular looks cool...kinda nice...

oh..the KOPITIAM shifted to dunno which storey...basemant changes alot too...maybe one yr ago...it's already like this...but didn't really notice...anyway... there are super many and all sorts of food/restaurants there...


walked around the empty complex for awhile..i decided to take a bus to causeway pt...wanting to get a present for pj...then when i got there...my mood swung...felt so sianz that i had totally no mood to shop...saw the thing that i wanna buy...but i ended up not buying and went home...

went home...ate lunch and napped...felt even worse when i woke up...i felt so terribly alone...so wrecked...
i think i felt angry at myself...at how foolish i am...at how i try to 欺骗自己的感情...how i blind myself in whatever possible ways when i have already seen the light...

like what i told hk in the evening...i think i understand myself but i just refuse to accept why am i like tat...well...i can't really say that i dun understand myself...coz i really know what kind of 犯贱 person i am...haha...so harsh...ouch...it hurts

argh...why do i feel that way?



dun worry...everything will just be fine! this, i promise myself....

"我站在你不远处
默默地为你祝福
把对你的爱藏起来
放你去寻找追逐
我站在爱的不远处
不在乎守候多辛苦
当你孤单时想起我
那是我最大的幸福"

-- 不远 - elva...

one of the songs in elva's newest album...very nice...well...at least it appeals to me the very first time i heard it...go find the song...

i'm beginning to fall in love with this song...and with elva again....lolz...

when you fell sick...you feel so vulnerable...you feel so in need of someone to take care of you...to love you...

i'm feeling like that these few dayz....the sad thing is...i dun have that 'someone' with me...sigh...tatz probably the reason why i hate to fall sick...it simply reveals the vulnerable side of me...it tells me tat my life lacks 'someone'...

argh...gotta get the tot off my mind...i'm NOT desperate to get attached!!!! it's just that it's lonely sometimes...to wanna tell something...but there is no one there to tell that to...


04 x panadol cold aint working...i feel so heavy-headed and dizzy...

giddy-giddy-dizzy-dizzy....

omg...i gotta sleep (though i have already spent so much time today and yest sleeping)...but isn't what everyone will tell? that a 'sicko' should rest more...ha...i must get well soon! be strong! no one's gonna feed you medicine and h2o..

sick!!!

just happened to be holding on to my phone when the msg came...thankz for replying...it has made my day feel better... :)


well...as the title suggests....i am feeling rather sick today...the flu from yesterday isn't gone yet...in fact...developed a slight fever today...slept for so long the whole day...woke up at 11 plus to eat breakfast and watch some dvd...back to bed at 1 plus...woke up again at 3 for lunch...and slept again...

..my head feels so heavy...eyes are watery...the lower eye bag area feels swollen...no! i didn't cry...the tears jus flows out when i tilt my head sideways...really slept too much...until i wasn't sure if what's happened were my dream or real life...i tot my mum gave me money for new yr clothes and feb...but i couldn't find it....then i realizes that i dreamt of my mum giving money...and when i woke up...i was so blur that i tot it's real...oh yah...and some part of my bones hurt...whatz wrong?!?!?!? seriously...

sleeping too much isn't really good...had this vomitting feeling when i woke up...wonder why...

the illness strangely didn't affect my appetite at all...felt in constant hunger in fact...

drowning myself with h2o...gobbled down so many litres today than i went toilet umpteen times...

oh man...didn't go out the entire day...was supposed to go teach tuition in noon....then go over to amelia's 21st bday...then meet up with my jc friends at night...

sorry to amelia...hope you njoy your happy 21st bday!!!

sorry to my jc friends....hope you all had fun at vivo...and as for my very late bday present...help me keep 1st ba...haha...thankz


need to get well soon...the term is starting...real hectic schedule....i can't afford to fall sick....coz there is no one to look after me!!!! haha...

week one's over...so fast...it felt like the busiest week 1 ever so far...

acquisition of textbooks...sigh...money money and more money...but so far...only bought one...1 of the module can reuse my Triple W...the other one getting 2nd hand on next wed...one more dunno if should buy or photocopy (particle tech)..think i should be buying...save the trouble..then matlab dunno how...

the week seemed long due to the 6hr additional crash course on matlab...crazy...shouldn't have let us take C in the 1st place...straight away learn matlab is how good larz...save so much trouble...

and so...the 1st week ends with a flu...and a developing sore throat which i can feel it coming...felt half-dead in school today...the 'tap' was leaking non-stop...tissue depleted super rapidly...

sigh...

tutz are starting next week...lects so far all dun understand....everything seems to be different this sem...so chim...so packed...so f* up...oppz....

gotta start getting into the momentum fast...

pls stop raining!!!!

wonder how true the test below is....

hmm...

Number of True Loves You'll Have: 2 ???
Number of Times You'll Have Your Heart Broken: 2 ???


i have had one true love ...and heart broken once...

when will i meet my next true love?

who's gonna break my heart for my 2nd time?

"You're good at wooing someone slowly, without them even realizing it!"... how slow is 'slow'?

so...have you fallen for me? hahaha...


crazy...how much can you tell from a brithdate! bleahz!

Your Birthdate: December 25

Calm and understated, you struggle to express your love with words. Over time, your partner learns to recognize your passion by the actions you take. You're good at wooing someone slowly, without them even realizing it! Number of True Loves You'll Have: 2 Number of Times You'll Have Your Heart Broken: 2 You are most compatible with people born on the 7th, 16th, and 25th of the month.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean For Your Love Life?

zs bloody timetable

as the title suggests....it's bloody...

hoohoo...just found out that there's a 'gem' in chem eng yr 2...

okay...i admit tat she is pretty..but i didn't know that she's in modelling...(though i'm not too sure larz...)

haha...happened to chance upon a pic of hers...pretty! really...

wat a gem in the vast ocean...

it's been a long time...didn't see you online for the past week...let alone any news or sms....

wonder where have you gone...what has happened to you...

have you be taking good care? resting enough?





i know these are things that i might not even get to know...so i can just hope...hope that everything is well for you...

偶尔 drop me a msg bah....as a friend....


i will smile for you! =)

歌曲：胡思乱想

歌手：无印良品

胡思乱想又过了一夜
思念的疑问并没有解决
我又胡乱想过了一夜
情感的东西是否需要感觉

也许我不知道
我是真不明了
人对情感的渴求
是否那麽重要

也许我不知道
你那儿最好
让我情牵忘也忘不了
也许我不知道
你真的那麽好
我的思念你又明了多少
我胡思乱想



a rather old song....the lyric is simple...but the meaning appeals to me so much....

officially the last day of holiday....

just came back from billiard-till-it-closes session with pj, kokz while the galz (yanz...qjia...ah yu) played pool....took so long to get in form...while pj and kokz got abit tired and slightly less accurate...i became on form...ha...


"你的嘴角 微微上翘
性感地无可救药
想象不到 如此心跳
你的一切都想要"

an extract from jay's 迷迭香 (it's pronounce as mi die xiang....NOT mi shi xiang!!!)...
boSsA nOvA...yeah! like this song...got the 懒散散的感觉...non-chalant....



last day...all hopes are dashed...

i know!! i know!!! it's time to move on...i AM moving!!! but very slowly thatz all....just let me be bah...

wonder why do i stay up every single night till 1-2am...staring at my comp blankly while i let the songs run out...

can't find a reason...perhaps a chance of you appearing online in my msn list is all i need...i am how foolish...i know!! i know everything about myself...the only thing i dunno is how to control myself and prevent me from hslx-ing (a.k.a 胡思乱想ing)...


fell asleep while on the sofa watching 百万宝 just now...i'm feeling tired....having spent the entire day outside...

i'm silly to be expecting a reply sms from you since last night...

a question asked is meant to be answered...it's just not too polite to totally ignore it...i'm slightly angry...but of course...more of disappointment...

i guess it can't be help...

i really needa let go...though i know i can't totally...

coz sub-consciously...i still dun want to give up totally...

i know the only way to stop all these is to confess and get an answer...but i'm afraid to know the truth...i'm not ready to face the consequence...the entire awkwardness...the possibility of losing you as my friend completely...

sigh...all that i can pray for now...is to hope that you are well...

and time & work will deplete my memory capacity of you....it's gonna be this way...


was talking to ru de the other day...he said that if he was me...he would just tell...and no matter wat the outcome...he would hope the friendship is maintained...perhaps him and me are very different when it comes relationships...i'm not someone that take up and let go easily...once i decided to cross the line for a chance of being more than friends...i would find it hard to come back...so, i would rather not tell so as to not sink too deep...as i know i would need to get myself back floating normally again in the vast sea of emotions...


jialiang said my blog is emotional...haha...well...it's not called my emotion dumping ground for nothing....those things that i kept in my heart and which i decided have no other places to go will come here...so pple who are kpo about me are warmly welcomed here...but most of the things mentioned in my blog will stay in the blog...not ready to discuss anything that i mention here openly upfront...call it 逃避 if you want...but thatz the best that i can do for myself...

5 nights....

gotta start tuning my body clock back to study dayz...sigh...wun be waiting all nights for nothing anymore...smart zs gotta act smart when it comes to emotions too!
=)


S.H.E concert on 27th jan (sat)...148 bucks tickets are all sold out! (sigh~)....would you be interested to watch the concert with me? should i ask?

but you didn't reply my last msg...i feel discouraged to msg you again...i dun wanna be a nuisance...really....just wanna tell you that i'm here still...but getting tired and restless...preparing to move on...without you but thatz not my desire...i have no options to choose from....

as the day goes by...my phone didn't go 'bankai'...

i guess i know the answer to the question which i didn't even ask...

friday's here...saturday and then sunday...the hols will be over...and kind of expectedly, the lunch date is not realised...

i'm disappointed...and in fact...a little bit angry...

foolish me...to have spent so many lunches alone at home with 'da bao' food...just becoz of a silly hope...

but maybe that's the best way to tell me what i need to know...

the new sem will start...no matter wat...life will go on...be it with memories of you...or without...




went billiard today with pj and yanz...then to vivo for a movie...伤城...the movie wasn't too bad...but wasn't really in a mood for such a 'talking'...intellectual movie...no doubt the plot was beautifully crafted...but lacks action...not exciting...

original plan was to catch night at the museum...something light-hearted and funny...but it's sold out...even for a thurs 4:05pm show...sigh...

vivo looks and feel big...to make the shoppers feel lost...so tt they will 'loiter' in the complex for a longer time? so tt they might stop by the eatery and restaurants to take a rest?



alrite...gotta go slp le...tmr got the CPTC industrial visit...abit sianz...but signed up le...might as well go lorz....





feeling lost again....need to find the zs back!

just 3 nights didn't see her on msn...

我怎么那么想她...不过， 她是不会知道我对她的思念的...

this was what we did from 31st Dec 2006 to 1st Jan 2007...

posing!!!

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"为你付出那种伤心你永远不了解
我又何苦勉强自己爱上你的一切
你又狠狠逼退我的防备
静静关上门来默数我的泪
明知道让你离开他的世界不可能会
我还傻傻等到奇迹出现的那一天
直到那一天你会发现
真正爱你的人独自守着伤悲"

--- 痴心绝对 - 李圣杰

just finished watching 恶魔在身边 last night (or rather, this earli morning at abt 3:30am)...hmm...slightly touched...but not enough to make me cry...

wonder why do 偶像剧s always have 大团圆结局...why is every couple in the drama always so 圆满 in the end....why are they able to come up with nice, meaningful, touching phrases to say to each other...and never ever forget what they say to one another...

unrealistic plot...but kinda funnie...

i think ttz the reason why some pple like taiwan idol drama so much...coz they have handsome hunks and pretty babes...and the storyline is always so amazing...in the sense that it will not happen to an ordinary person's life...maybe it might...but i have never encounter or hear anything close...

come to think abt it....every idol drama is almost the same...there will be gals that are 'dying for love' and guys who are 坏坏的 and never lack admirers....haha....then the gals will try all sorts of funnie ways to get close to the guys they like...

does this reflect the social outlook of the taiwanese? gals getting more 主动? hmm...dunno...haha

it's just like how K dramas are all the same...it will revolve around 4 leads (2 males and 2 females) in a love RECTANGLE....then finally...in the end...despite various obtacles such as third party...family...the supposed-to-be-together couple will gain approval of everyone and live happily ever after....

drama is such a fantasy world....i wish i could live in one and never come out...

haaz

如果喜欢一个人 又要假装不喜欢她

那是不可能的...

::: 1000th post :::

shall dedicate this 1000th post of my blog to:
1. the end of 2006
2. the start of 2007

well...2006 has been a rather eventful year...so many upz and downz...

the 1st half of the year was hmm...happily mugging my life away...got myself tangled into a messy relationship...erm...actually not messy...coz i'm the one that caused the mess...but now...my 2 friends are happily together...and i'm of coz happy for them...

year 1 sem 2's result was great!...my best so far....and 1st time got into DL...satisfied...and will continue to strive harder...

went Chess FWC 2006 as councillors...the Acqua pple were great! and got to know a few of my uni friends better...pple like ru de, ming yang, hong keat, jialiang, shanbing, yimin, blar blar... and got to know many year 1s that are...erm...funz....and nice...

dunno if i should consider going fwc a blessing...or should i regret going...sigh....no doubt i got to know many nice people and make more friends....but then...if i didnt go...the cause of my problem now would have never exist...

well...i dun think i can blame anyone for my own problem...i have only myself to blame...for letting me fall so easily...

hmm..well...i guess fwc is still a blessing...coz i'm glad i got to know you...even though we are only friends...but i can't ask for more than that...

yes...i admit tt i like you...even though i didn't show it...even though i didn't tell anyone (that we both know)...but the feelings can't lie...

but i'm not going to tell that to you...coz i know you are happily attached...i dun wanna complicate things...

"隐瞒比较容易吧
免得感情变得复杂"
--- 我很想爱他 Twins

i know i am foolish enough to still feel this way...but like what my friend asked...everytime when i like someone...how come the feeling is so intense? even though it very much one-sided...i have no answer to that...

maybe me and pj are too similar....to a horrifying extent...sigh...

my friend just asked me abt my 2007 new year resolution...

i replied " to be happy and to 对自己好一点..." sounds simple enough...but it's never easily achieved...these are things in life that dunno have a definite answer....what define happiness? some people say it's self defined...hmm...maybe i should search for a zs' version of happiness...but as to 对自己好一点...i find it hard...

coz i alwayz 钻牛角尖...as i have always said...人类是犯贱的...腐败的...haha...man...i'm beginning to speak like Kira (yagami light in DEATHNOTE)...

okay...on a serious note...i never fail to find problem for myself...

so for this coming 2007...with 365 dayz to go....let me let go off every memory of mine...

时间能冲淡一切...let me slowly forget you...let me start treating you as a friend...let me continue to seek for the happiness that i want...

okay...some of my viewers may know who is the 'you' that i'm referring to... but that doesn't matter much to me...

as my current msn nick says "i'm not hiding...i'm just not showing..."

i no longer wanna hide anything...coz it feels terrible to keep everything inside...so here i am...saying that i like 'you'...and i know i shouldn't...so i will learn to give up...

dun think 'you' will see wat i wrote here...but just in case you do...please...please dun avoid me becoz of that...i really wanna learn to treat you as a friend...coz i know you are a worthy friend and i dun wanna lose you as my friend...=)

alrite...it's a rather long post to start the year...oh yah...year 2 sem 1's results aint too bad....in fact...i thought it good enough....coz i'm learning to lower expectations of myself...

my motto in life for 2007: live simple and be happy...


cheers!