ever feel that you can't get to sleep no matter how tired you are, simply because you know that 'someone' is not yet asleep?

ever feel the anxiety of going to sch to see someone but fear the possibility that you might see that 'someone' with another 'someone'?

dilemmas in life aren't there without a reason...they tend to question you on some fundamental questions in life...

"what is it that really matter to you?"

"will you be willing to sacrifice something or some part of you for that?"

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such entries....

yes...i aint out of that phase yet...the sticky situation in which i simply dunno what to do...i hate to feel that i can't speak my inner voice out...there are things i want to say...things i want to ask...

everything will be put in place if i don't 逃避 ... if i don't 胡思乱想 to fill the 'gaps' of uncertainty...

i know what i have to do to get myself out of it...but i simply can't do it...no matter how hard i try...

sometimes, i really think that all the problems that i face are self-inflicted...self-induced...self-imagined...

this 'self' aint strong as it used to be...i can feel that in almost everything...every situation that i am in...the lack of confidence is severe...the vulnerability is obvious...the incompetence is a result of these...

i need to change...

and i am subtly changing....i hope...